A friend had a quotation on her blog "There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do." (Freya Stark) So, does this mean that once I agree to something I don't believe in, there's no way I can be happy? Really? What about if what I agreed to is consistent with another belief I hold? Is it possible to hold conflicting beliefs, or is that just crazy-making?
I believe it's absolutely essential for kids to have both parents (unless one is dead, of course) home at some point during the 24 hours that make up each day. Simply put, parents should sleep at home every night. I believe that when one chooses not to have both parents accessible to the kids, they're failing their kids. I really do believe this. Kids do not need absent parents.
I also believe Gary has a right to be happy in his work, to be free to try new things as long as there's enough income. So, 18 months ago, when Gary told me he'd like to try an over the road driving job, that it would increase his potential for better-paying jobs, and I could see it was really something he needed to try. I felt there was no way to say no to him, and be true to my belief that I want him to be happy.
So, I said yes. Knowing how much we'd miss him (tho we've missed him more than I could have anticipated). Knowing how much hard it would be for me (tho, again, it's been harder than I anticipated). Even tho I suspected the job market was soon going to tank, I hoped against hope he'd be able to try this, and get out in time to still find a job at home.
And here we are today, with me living a life that if anyone were living it, I'd say their unhappiness is just what they had coming. I mean, if you make a choice you know is in opposition to what you fervently believe, you can't expect happiness to follow.
Have I really given up any possibility of happiness by agreeing to something that opposes one belief, while supporting another? Man, I hope not. Which brings me to my next post......
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